modern family

i want to be like phil and have a hot wife and kids.  But i want 4 kids, not 3.  2 daughters 2 sons.

moo

I finally started wearing retainers again... they look like cows!!

I was saying the Lord's prayer in my head and when I came to the "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us" line I started thinking about how hard it is to forgive someone.  It's SOOoOOOOoooo easy to just say, "I forgive you," but it's freakkeeeennnnn HARD to actually forgive them in your heart and your attitude toward them.  Every time I see the person I start by thinking that I forgave them, and then I start thinking about why I forgave them and then I realize that I didn't truly forgive them and become bitter again..... I need to not think about it and just do it.

being Christian is hard (:

Love

Today, I truly experienced our Father's love for the first time.

I Can Only Imagine

"I can only imagine 
What it will be like 
When I walk 
By your side 

I can only imagine 
What my eyes will see 
When your face 
Is before me 
I can only imagine

I can only imagine 

Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel 
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still 
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall 
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all 
I can only imagine

I can only imagine 

I can only imagine 
When that day comes 
When I find myself 
Standing in the Son 

I can only imagine 
When all I will do 
Is forever 
Forever worship You 
I can only imagine"


I Can Only Imagine by Mercy Me




Such a beautiful song, it gives me chills every time i listen to it.

She's so pretty!!! and she's a good singer and she's christian omg too bad she's taken D:

Paramore at the VMAs was soo good with all the lightbulbs soo coooool

i miss this, but winter's right around the corner!

Donner Ski Ranch.  Located in north Lake Tahoe, this small resort with its $20 lift tickets attracted the attention of my dad's money saving habits.  This was the place I first learned to snowboard with my $50 Big 5 board.  This year was my second year snowboarding, the second year coming to this resort.  We drove up to tahoe from LA, a 10 hour drive.  This year was the year that the local mountain, Mountain High was getting insane amounts of snow.

We stayed in Reno for the whole trip, driving to north Tahoe at 7 in the morning to satisfy the needs of my brother and I, two middle schoolers excited to snowboard for as long as we could.  The mountain road up gave us a lot of trouble with all the snow everywhere; thankfully we had a 4 wheel drive car.  By the time we had reached Donner Ski Ranch, we were in the middle of a blizzard.  I have no clue how we made it there alive, but it was white out conditions.  You couldn't see a thing!  The resort obviously didnt expect anyone to come out that day with the conditions as bad as they were; they were selling lift tickets for the full day for $4!!  After lots of arguing and whining with our parents, we both got lift tickets and were riding the lift up.  The conditions were scary.  We couldn't see anything more than 5 feet away and going up the lift I started having doubts about snowboarding that day.  As soon as I strapped in and took my first turn, all my doubts vanished.

There was so much snow, it was ridiculous.  Powder everywhere, the mountain was completely empty, and we were loving life.  The whole day we literally saw 2 other people on the slopes.  It was hands down the most fun day I had snowboarding.  I wasn't even that good; I had barely learned how to carve and was just riding down the slope.  But riding down the slope that day in those conditions was more fun than hitting jumps and rails.  I'd gladly give up a day in the park now for a day like that again.  That experience made me fall in love with snowboarding; without it, who knows if I would love the sport as much as I do today.

Proverbs 14:30

"A heart at peace gives life to the body,
but envy rots the bones."

Lord, be my strength while I am weak

Office Party

Toby:	We should really have the office's air quality tested. We have radon coming from below. We have asbestos in the ceilings. These are silent killers.
Michael Scott:	You are the silent killer. Go back to the annex.
Toby:	You'll see.

oh man I love the office.

Christian Metalcore

a lot of metal/screamo bands have songs that convey dark or satanic messages sometimes and i think that causes a lot of people to generalize and think that all metal is bad. BUT, Christian metal is so different!! it's the exact opposite. There are songs about struggling with lust, struggling with sin, being persecuted for their religions, etc. They may not be like Hillsongs or hymns, but they aren't only about loving God. These songs reach out to a different crowd, people that love metal but they don't know Jesus. They're more real, giving people a message that they can relate to. Of course, this is all just my opinion and I could be totally wrong..

one of my favorite songs by Underoath. it's so simple, yet the message is so great. God loves us even though we are so unloving, faithful though we are so unfaithful, graceful though we are so unwilling to show grace to others. "Jesus, I'm ready to come home."

going off on a tangent, ocean's eleven is such a cool movie!! and funny too!

black dude speaking:

"might as well call it whitejack!"

LOLOL WHITEJACK

prayer.

God answers prayers. I know that He does. But how come it never seems like He answers my prayers? How come it always seems like whenever I pray for something that I want I never get it? Even if it seems like what I want will be glorifying to Him? Maybe it's because of my heart. My heart is so selfish, so stubborn, so bent on only wanting what will benefit me. There are definitely things that I pray for that will further His kingdom. But that's not the main reason I pray for those things; I want those things to further my own kingdom.

God, help me change my heart. I want to be selfless, thinking of glorifying You and only You. May my heart long for what You long for. Break my heart for what breaks Yours. Tug and pull at my heart until it reflects yours. I pray that the things I want are not of this world, but things that will truly further Your kingdom here on earth.

He's changing me, my precious Jesus

I'm not the same person that I used to be

Some times it's slow going

but there's a knowing

That one day perfect I will be

How great is His grace and mercy that He can still say He loves us and forgives us after everything that we have done and will continue to do.

I want/long/desire/strive/aim/struggle/work to be like You.

love

proverbs 21:21

Sigh

Rach L Yu

=)

and heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss

one of my favorite lines from one of my favorite songs

just keep.. running?

Running, running, running... never losing focus on the prize ahead, an eternal life in heaven with the One who is most High. I just hope I can always trust in Him to have the strength to continue this uphill battle every single day of my life.

myooosix

sunny days

The sun was shining, clear but not too hot. The woods in the valley were still leafy and full of colour , and seemed peaceful and wholesome.

mmmmm sounds like La Jolla :)

Okay I'm gonna go back to reading, Stay classy San Diego.

triton eye

sooo finally back in SD after (I think) losing my voice from singing in David Hong's car at 2 am. YayyYy!! Just posting this before I go to bed to wake up for my 8 am, which I WILL go to. Most of the time anyway. I really need to step it up this quarter so no more games. And I need to sleep early. And find a job. So much to do and its barely the first day of the quarter!!! D:

When I think about school: orz

if anyone knows what orz is I'll buy them lunch. and no cheaters (google)!!

dreams

when I'm older



I want a house like this; lots of windows, warm lights, not too big so it's cozy.



Somewhere where I can have a view like that, the city lights making the sky shine, but not polluted so I can still see the sky and the stars, somewhere I can see the ocean too.



And this sitting inside my garage. :)

outbreak!!

omygosh. i'm sick. again!!! gahhhh

I hope this Korean medicine stuff works really well... my mom claimed its better than nyquil... I really want to feel better for tomorrow, which is CCM SPRING ADVANCE YAYYY!!

haha I have so many excites for it, been looking forward to it all week. The past few days at home have been fun, just visiting grandparents, seeing my aunt and uncle and my little cousins (The cutest kids in the world, period. It's a fact, not an opinion), hanging out with my mom and her spoiling me, seeing friends from church. It actually feels pretty good to be home, much better than I expected it too.

Today I watched Repo Men. It got a 20% on Rotten Tomatoes, and I have to admit that I spent most of the 2 hours being thankful that I was watching it for free. But then, the ending?!!!!??!?!?!?!!?!?!!! omgosh. Very surprising. Very Shutter Island-eque. But no, the ending was not worth the 10 bucks I might have very foolishly spent if not for the free ticket from my brother. Soo if you were thinking of watching the movie be a cheapo and watch it online! Before I watched this movie, and before I went to eat Thai food for an early dinner/late lunch, I was at church. I thoroughly enjoyed the service, with all the prayer and the fairly entertaining sermon by my hyperactive most definitely always entertaining pastor. It always turns out that every Sunday, I always hear what I need to hear. God is so so so SO GOOD!

I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Galatians 2:20


In other news, my Grandmother told me to date around with as many girls as possible. hardy har har.

everlasting.

But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.

2 Peter 3:8

Ohmy I can't wait until the day that I can finally see His face and be in awe of His glory and almighty goodness :)

the start of something beautiful

now I lay here owing my life to a stranger
and I realize that empty words are not enough
I'm left here with the question of just
what have I to show except the promises I never kept?
I lie here shaking on this bed, under the weight of my regrets

I want to do too many things. I'm going to stop wanting and start doing. I'm going to live my life to the fullest, all for His glory, in a way that I don't have to live with any more regrets. Hopefully, I can use this blog to document what I'm doing to change the way I live, starting tonight (or technically, this morning).

Reread Isiah 58. Jon Shieh shared this chapter with me at night prayer yesterday. It's about true fasting, how when we fast we grumble and complain about it. We are barely giving up one day, or for some people, weeks, for the Lord and all we can do is talk about how hungry we are or how much we miss Facebook. Fasting is all about the Lord. We should be taking the food that we would have eaten that day and feeding the homeless, the poor, the broken, both physically and spiritually. Every day should be a fast, a fast from the norms of this world, an attempt to break free from Satan's grip on our hearts and our minds.

Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter - when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?

Isiah 58: 6-7

When the opportunity arises for me to feed the hungry, to clothe the naked, to pray for the broken, will I be able to?

Cloudy with a chance of... Vanilla Heath Bar Crunch???

As I was watching Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs just now I realized that the relationship between Flint and his dad is actually very similar to my own relationship with my dad. I don't want to stereotype, but the typical Asian father-son relationship is one of awkward silences and unspoken feelings for one another. My mom is a teacher, and I grew up always seeing my mom for that reason. We always got out of school at the same time and she would come pick me and my brother up after school. She would always ask us how our day was, no matter how many times we told her how annoying she was, and always make us say "I love you" before we go anywhere without her. She'd make us grilled cheese sandwiches and quesadillas and give us cut up apples with peanut butter (which sound extremely delectable right now) no matter how full we said we were. She made sure to annoy us by saying it every time she saw us walking around the house and giving us kisses at every chance she got. Even though I would roll my eyes back and say "yeah whatever" and "ewww gross, go away," the point was made: my mom really REALLY loved me. Now, onto my dad. I rarely saw him at home. He would come home from work a few hours before my bedtime, which would be spent eating dinner and then watching some tv before his bedtime. The most I interacted with him whilst he was home was me trying to scare him in the hallway when he came into the house from the garage. Other than that and the occasional "NICKY come give abba a hug and ask him how work was" from my mom I would never really talk to him. I made no real effort to talk to him; he gave an equal amount of effort back trying to talk to me. As the years went by it got worse and worse. As a high school student going through puberty I could care less about how my parents days were or how they were doing, everything was about me, me, me.

After seeing all the scenes in the movie where Flint looks for his dad's approval and any hint of love, I realized, "wow, story of my life." I'm always hoping that my dad will approve; approve of my career choice, my school, my relationship with God, my friends, my whole entire life. I've been really reevaluating my relationship with my parents this past month and watching this movie that was probably targeted towards 7 year olds has really helped to realize something that I hope I had realized years ago: I don't have to be perfect for my dad to approve of what I do. He already loves me. He loved me when I was a whiny little toddler, when I was a sneaky middle schooler selling lunch tickets to buy pizza hut at school, even when I had a hormonal imbalance in high school. He loved me yesterday, he loved me today, and he will love me tomorrow. He will love me no matter what. All I need to do is try my hardest at everything at I do and he will be proud of me. How can I have been so thick headed to not realize that until now?

I know the chances are zero that my dad will read this but...

I love you abba!! I hope that I can openly express this more often and make sure that you know that I love you and I really appreciate everything that you've done for me so far. I know you think that I take everything for granted, and up till now, I really have. I've finally realized how much you've sacrificed for me to go to school with no financial aid, to pay for my housing, and to pay for Darricke's tuition as well as taking us on vacations everywhere. So thank you!! And I love you!!


After writing all that... I now know that the reason why my walk with God hasn't been so great lately is because I forgot why He put me here. I must must MUST start working hard for His glory and to really lift Him up in EVERYTHING I do. Starting riiiiggghhhhtttt now. I can tell this is gonna be really hard.


I really liked Steve. I want a monkey minion. That'd be the greatest.

Oh, and sorry to any poor soul that actually reads this huge wall of text. It was really only meant for me to get my thoughts down onto paper (so to speak).

wonderland

Soooo we watched Alice in Wonderland tonight, and despite what most people thought I actually liked it. Although it didn't live up to my expectations I still thought it was good... I reallllyyyy liked the twins and crazy rabbit ahahahaha... ohh and even though I don't really like cats, if there was one that was the same colors as the Cheshire cat I'd really like it.

clear skies

The weather has been so great lately, I just want to sit on the beach and stare at the sky for hours. Every time I wake up I wish I was laying on the sand with my ipod...

restart.

time to press the button and start over.